I think that at one time or another we've all been in the uncomfortable position of finding ourselves in that most uncomfortable position that somebody I know once describe in "nice speak" as being trapped on a "well known highly polluted tributary with no visible means of propulsion".
While I have to admit that I appreciate the "polite" way of saying it I am not a hamster, Most of the time I'd still rather just say it in plain English: "Up shit creek without a paddle." It's a condition where a situation has gone from bad to worse with no readily evident means to improve things. Such as not having life insurance leads frequently to tons of financial problems or the brakes failing on your car when you're headed down a long, steep hill or when some stupid thing you did when you were younger while your friend was holding a video camera suddenly finds it's way onto YouTube and 847,953 people (your employer, coworkers and significant other being among them) get to see that video of you being an idiot.
Well, now there's good news for all travelers on Shit Creek. You don't have to be without a paddle!